Scotoma....

...the mind chooses to see what it wants to...

A friend blogged about it recently...(take a bow metzy!! Will the real metzy please stand up) and it got me thinking...how the true it is!!

think about it....everytime in life...do you really see things objectively for what it is? Or do you see that which you want to? Do you see that glass of water half full on a shitty day or do you see an almost full glass as not even full? Do u see the actions of someone for what it could be or do you see it for something that you want it to be, or for that matter what u think it is...without really knowing? Do you pass judgement? Do you trust blindly???

It's like in the Matrix, where the little kid tells NEO..."Don't try to bend the spoon instead realise the truth....there is no spoon".

It's an interesting phenomenon...really....how it all pans out and the cards fall....

Take for example the course i am in. It's shitty....no point, no real end product, no real content, no real MBA. (It's like a major money spinning mechanism. People one fine day got together and decided...hey u know what...lets see if we can squeeze like 14k pounds out of a bunch of suckers! And u know what lets actively target the countries like India where even though they cannot afford it and will have to mortgage their house, car, dog and neighbours a few times over to get the money, ppl will still raise the cash and come!!) But it's there bcos ppl like to see it as something big and people running it are convinced that it is the solution to the world's hunger problem, world peace and just about anything else you can think off. (UN goes...Damn we need to solve this issue in bahrain. Lets get a football MBA in....they are the only guys who can solve this!! Yeah right!!) But then there's me who is convinced otherwise and could well have just burnt all that money and it would have probably been the same! But that's where Scotoma kicks in.....am i looking at it that way bcos i feel so let down by the course and that all the course is not as bad as the beginning?? Is it just in my mind and maybe a more open mind would actually turn this all around and make some damn sense??

But it's never that simple is it? Academics are least of your problems though at the time they always seem so huge and everything, it's probably the easiest to deal with. Why? Cos u need marks....that's it. It's quantifiable...yeah sure it affects life...but does it really make a huge difference? The guys who do the best are guys who invaribaly leave school, college or whatever (Einstein, bill gates anyone?? Yeah i aim high. Always go big...that way when u crash u know u atleast tried!! It's kind of an antithesis that i aim high fully expecting to crash...but then...such is life)

It's the life choices that end up screwing u up! Scotoma in life...now that's a bitch. (it is actually as bad as it sounds. Scotoma of life!! Oh my god doctor??what does that mean? It means that...well ur screwed!) I mean really....when things seem a certain way, when u are sure ur getting screwed by someone (and not in the way u'd like..) being taken advantage of, but u just can't do anything about it. you know u should, u don't need to put urself through this...but no!!! u still go through it day after day after day....why?? bcos u can't help it! Mind says dude...ur screwed!! but u think that's just scotoma...it can't be that bad can it? That's not what is happening is it? Na.....it'll be alright. It's just a phase!! Wake up jackass!! ur being played like a well tuned piano i tell u!! smell the coffee (rather bad one that i make as well. I really need to find some good coffee. u know the kind that makes u wake up in the morning and go...hmmm!! anyway..i digress...). U know u get left feeling like Tom from those T&J cartoons where he gets conned by Jerry and then his head is replaced by a Jackass's head when he realises it!! (That used to be good fun. Screw work and watch T&J....haha good times...and once again...i digress...)

so what do you do? well....apparently nothing....cos common sense and logic goes out the window...so....u just keep trying to bend the spoon i guess...