So....what's the point anyway??

I find myself thinking along these lines rather often. "So...what's the point anyway??"

No, seriously...what is the point? Of everything. Work, life..etc etc. Whats the point?

This is possibly going to be by far the most random blog post i have ever written because very honestly i have no idea what the point of it is!! But i feel the need to write it down nevertheless at this point...so i will. Afterall whats the point of not writing it either!!

So where's all this coming from?? Well, I'm not sure of that either!

But don't you go into this phase in life when you are not really sure where life is headed? What are you really doing? and more importantly...why are you doing it? Sometimes you just can't see the bigger picture...in fact very often you can't see the bigger picture! (And this is not just because i can't appreciate art!) Sometimes i seriously doubt if there even is a bigger picture! I really do think it is an elaborate hoax...this "Bigger Picture" crap. You mean i work all my life to teach myself to appreciate the bigger picture without really being able to appreciate the smaller aspects? Seriously, how can you really appreciate the smaller aspects in their right context till you know the bigger picture?? And by the time you realise the bigger picture, you don't really remember the smaller aspects to appreciate them!!!

Like for example you slog your ass off through school and college and then when you are 25 nobody really gives a damn how much you scored!!(Well, me being the quintessential south Indian nerd did slog my ass off. Did get told how my life would have no meaning unless i scored 90 odd percentage and how the world would implode and life as we know it would cease to exist if i didn't get into engineering....so yes...i did slog! If you didn't...well...good on you! But you don't know how difficult life can be..so there!!!) So things that suddenly seem Oh so important and take up a cart load of your time will probably mean a little less than nothing very soon. Then you turn back and say...."So...what was the point of all that anyway??"

I do feel i am wasting away my life in a lot of ways without really realising it. When i got up on august 5 last year i suddenly realised that i was 24 and had just sleep walked through the last 16 odd years!!(i say 16 because i am assuming that its alright to bawl, crawl and in general have no idea about life for the first 8...so if you already had your life planned out by the time you were 6...then woo hoo!!good on you!!) Don't get me wrong, i'm not regretting anything i have done in this time cos it all has made me into the person i am now (Which i am very proud of by the way) but somehow it all feels....for the lack of a better word...pointless...in some sense atleast! There are so many things i didn't know of, didn't experience, didn't think of and so on and so forth which i look back on and wonder ...what if.....

It would probably have resulted in me having a total different life right now. Different approach, different mentality, different everything....and then a different destination! So you see....since i didn't have any idea of the bigger picture then...i did what i had to, to survive in the dog eat dog world and then realised that i was a dog eating dogs thinking they tasted like chicken!! (not the best analogy...but you get it!). So yeah....while we could read a book to know why bread always falls with the buttered side down...what's the point??