....we have all done it. and we all will keep doing it. cos it's something we have to do. Come on now...don't lie. Be true to yourself...you have stared into space during that important meeting wondering about anything and everything that had nothing to do with anything and especially nothing to do with the meeting at hand....so don't pretend like you don't know what i'm talking about...
I do it a lot lately, i have realised....space does hold some rather amazing secrets and it would be great to know about it, learn it, understand it yada yada..
But the only problem is, my space is not really 'space' in the 'big black nothingness' form of things....it is actually the parking lot and the adjacent road outside my house. Quiet a nice view it is...and the topic of some intense research by me over the last few weeks...
For example i know that the lot has 230 parking spaces in the half that i can see....so extrapolating it to the whole lot i would say it has approx 450 parking spaces. thats a lot...for a hospital by the way. Of it only 90% is utilised at any point of time....the rest are empty. There are 55 cars whose number plates add upto 70 and 63 whose number plates start with 4...ok i'm kidding about the last line
but seriously....i even know that the signal on the road there is 40secs per road and approx 14 cars pass through everytime it turns....freaky right...tell me about it!!
So why does the road and parking lot suddenly hold such fascination, you ask? (well you don't ask, cos you don't really care, but for the sake of argument, lets assume that you do ask...) it's because i am ruminating the meaning of life and other such questions. No seriously....i am....why u ruminate so, you ask? Well, that...i don't have an answer to....
But i do know that the answer to life, the universe, everything...is 42. I guess that's enough for now...(Those who din get that...go watch The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy which is a wholly amazing movie...it really is!)
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
3 days for the world to turn right side up again....
.....rather an interesting concept on Bones tonight. Well not on TV but online...but interesting nevertheless....
it's been 10 maybe 14 days...so yeah we know THAT doesn't work...
it's been 10 maybe 14 days...so yeah we know THAT doesn't work...
Friday, March 11, 2011
how long....
my shot at poetry....
How long to make the effort,
how long to try,
eventually you will want to give up,
but till then u prefer to fry,
But why? Seriously.....Why???
(let's hear the drumroll pls...and the applause!! Thank you thank you!! And see it's not just the rhyme, the words actually make sense..)
How long to make the effort,
how long to try,
eventually you will want to give up,
but till then u prefer to fry,
But why? Seriously.....Why???
(let's hear the drumroll pls...and the applause!! Thank you thank you!! And see it's not just the rhyme, the words actually make sense..)
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Sense of Humour....
....or is it nonsense of humour??
Picking up from my previous post, have u realised how you suddenly become really funny when you are drunk? Forget you, have you realised how the general sense of humour quotient of the whole room goes up when you are drunk? Everything is funny....even a glass of water. It's just so hilarious that there is a glass of water just sitting there...on the table...looking at you...judging....
anyway.....
...the reason i bring it up is bocs, on my way back from said trip earlier...i was stopped by the UK Border something something (I don't remember. honestly..) at the coach station. Now....to give u some background....i was drunk, and I had travelled by bus which makes u more high for some reason...and I had been listening to "Hold me, thrill me..." on the iPod...which is highly psychadelic...so I was well....buzzed...
So the guy gets into the bus before anyone can get off and says..."Please keep some incentive vacation ready cos we are changing all gravel hers" Actually that's what i heard. In hindsight, he probably said "Please keep some ID ready cos we are checking all travellers". Luckily though my lack of understanding didn't make much difference as I saw others handing him IDs and did the same (somehow sight still trumps hearing in these circumstances).
When i got to him, he looked at me and said "are you a student?". My reaction was to look him straight (or atleast as straight as I could) in the eye....for about 2 minutes. After this rather long silence, during which I had an expression like he had asked me the square root of 23, he said..."sir, are you a student?". To which I intelligently replied..."Maybe". Now let me clarify....at that time it seemed the right thing to do....i don't know who he is...so why am i answering his questions? My mother taught me not to talk to strangers....
But it wasn't a very wise choice obviously and I was asked to wait while they did a number of checks and took all details including my neighbour's pet dog's name...
The cool (read: ass freezing especially since I did not have the jacket) wind jolted me sufficiently back to reality for me to get away from there with some dignity intact. (I even managed to give them a hard time about a check earlier during which they caused a friend to miss the coach etc etc. Woo Hoo!!) I don't think they'll ever stop me again....
But......i like to think that I have a good sense of humour you know...
and i also think that it's not for everyone...
like the other day..(read: 5 hrs back)...I was talking to my friend and this is how the conversation went:
Friend: That guy is a real player
Me: I prefer Winamp
Now i was forced to apologise for what i thought was a very very intelligent joke...so i guess....it's about knowing your audience at the end of the day....
Picking up from my previous post, have u realised how you suddenly become really funny when you are drunk? Forget you, have you realised how the general sense of humour quotient of the whole room goes up when you are drunk? Everything is funny....even a glass of water. It's just so hilarious that there is a glass of water just sitting there...on the table...looking at you...judging....
anyway.....
...the reason i bring it up is bocs, on my way back from said trip earlier...i was stopped by the UK Border something something (I don't remember. honestly..) at the coach station. Now....to give u some background....i was drunk, and I had travelled by bus which makes u more high for some reason...and I had been listening to "Hold me, thrill me..." on the iPod...which is highly psychadelic...so I was well....buzzed...
So the guy gets into the bus before anyone can get off and says..."Please keep some incentive vacation ready cos we are changing all gravel hers" Actually that's what i heard. In hindsight, he probably said "Please keep some ID ready cos we are checking all travellers". Luckily though my lack of understanding didn't make much difference as I saw others handing him IDs and did the same (somehow sight still trumps hearing in these circumstances).
When i got to him, he looked at me and said "are you a student?". My reaction was to look him straight (or atleast as straight as I could) in the eye....for about 2 minutes. After this rather long silence, during which I had an expression like he had asked me the square root of 23, he said..."sir, are you a student?". To which I intelligently replied..."Maybe". Now let me clarify....at that time it seemed the right thing to do....i don't know who he is...so why am i answering his questions? My mother taught me not to talk to strangers....
But it wasn't a very wise choice obviously and I was asked to wait while they did a number of checks and took all details including my neighbour's pet dog's name...
The cool (read: ass freezing especially since I did not have the jacket) wind jolted me sufficiently back to reality for me to get away from there with some dignity intact. (I even managed to give them a hard time about a check earlier during which they caused a friend to miss the coach etc etc. Woo Hoo!!) I don't think they'll ever stop me again....
But......i like to think that I have a good sense of humour you know...
and i also think that it's not for everyone...
like the other day..(read: 5 hrs back)...I was talking to my friend and this is how the conversation went:
Friend: That guy is a real player
Me: I prefer Winamp
Now i was forced to apologise for what i thought was a very very intelligent joke...so i guess....it's about knowing your audience at the end of the day....
My Experiments with Truth....
....about Vodka.
Seeing as I'm no Gandhi (in any sense of the word. I'm not bald, I don't have a walking stick and I don't really care much for salt) my experiments with truth are limited to the benefits of hiding it. Manipulating it so that you only tell someone the partial truth for various reasons. That's technically not lying....
Anywho...this post has nothing to do with that....so moving along to what i actually wanted to talk about...Vodka...
I had a surreal experience yesterday aided by generous doses of the russian brew....and it made me realise a few home truths....which naturally i am keen to share. To be honest i'm not entirely sure of some of the facts...but hey! i'm sure enough to write this...so here goes....
(All people, incidents, actions, screw ups in this post are totally real to the best of my memory and any resemblance to anything living or dead, mostly living unless something has drastically changed in the last 12 hrs, is purely factual)
Lessons Learnt and Truths Realised:
1) Having a bottle of Vodka after not sleeping all night, seems like a good idea. It is not.
2) Downing the whole bottle in one go and then buying another because you still feel sane seems like an even better idea. This is definitely not.
3) You think you can't get drunk. You will. Soon. More than you can handle.
4) Vodka doesn't make you smart. At all.
5) It makes you catch the next available bus that day. To Manchester.
6) Vodka and a moving bus are the best way to fall asleep. Peacefully. Soundly....till u wake up in Manchester.
7) You will not wake up in Manchester. You will......in Leeds.
8) National Express guys are nice. They give you a free ride back to Manchester. Because you are drunk.
9) You think it is so warm and don't take a jacket. It is cold. Very cold. Even inside the bus. You realise this once you get out.
10) You get to Manchester. Finally.
11) You get up from your seat quickly. You shouldn't have. There are drunk elephants running around in your head. Playing football. Aggressively.
12) You don't think you are hungry. You are. You don't eat. You should have.
13) The aforementioned elephants are now drunk AND hungry. They are still playing football. More aggressively.
14) You see someone smoking and making smoke rings. You think it would be fun to know to do that. You might think of trying. (Let's leave the rest of that story out)
15) You have an assignment to submit in 2 days. You haven't started. You decide to start.
16) You feel creative. Very creative. You are. I said creative not intelligent. You still can't do finance.
17) Vodka is a good gambler. You make a ton of money at the Casino....then lose it. All of it.
18) You manage to make it to the bus to get back. It is freezing. You feel much more sane.
19) You listen to the iPod. The song you are listening to is "Gay Fish". You sing it out loud. You think you have a great voice. You don't. Luckily you are sitting alone.
20) You get up the next day morning with the mother of all headaches. What the fuck did you expect!!
and....that's the way it goes......
Seeing as I'm no Gandhi (in any sense of the word. I'm not bald, I don't have a walking stick and I don't really care much for salt) my experiments with truth are limited to the benefits of hiding it. Manipulating it so that you only tell someone the partial truth for various reasons. That's technically not lying....
Anywho...this post has nothing to do with that....so moving along to what i actually wanted to talk about...Vodka...
I had a surreal experience yesterday aided by generous doses of the russian brew....and it made me realise a few home truths....which naturally i am keen to share. To be honest i'm not entirely sure of some of the facts...but hey! i'm sure enough to write this...so here goes....
(All people, incidents, actions, screw ups in this post are totally real to the best of my memory and any resemblance to anything living or dead, mostly living unless something has drastically changed in the last 12 hrs, is purely factual)
Lessons Learnt and Truths Realised:
1) Having a bottle of Vodka after not sleeping all night, seems like a good idea. It is not.
2) Downing the whole bottle in one go and then buying another because you still feel sane seems like an even better idea. This is definitely not.
3) You think you can't get drunk. You will. Soon. More than you can handle.
4) Vodka doesn't make you smart. At all.
5) It makes you catch the next available bus that day. To Manchester.
6) Vodka and a moving bus are the best way to fall asleep. Peacefully. Soundly....till u wake up in Manchester.
7) You will not wake up in Manchester. You will......in Leeds.
8) National Express guys are nice. They give you a free ride back to Manchester. Because you are drunk.
9) You think it is so warm and don't take a jacket. It is cold. Very cold. Even inside the bus. You realise this once you get out.
10) You get to Manchester. Finally.
11) You get up from your seat quickly. You shouldn't have. There are drunk elephants running around in your head. Playing football. Aggressively.
12) You don't think you are hungry. You are. You don't eat. You should have.
13) The aforementioned elephants are now drunk AND hungry. They are still playing football. More aggressively.
14) You see someone smoking and making smoke rings. You think it would be fun to know to do that. You might think of trying. (Let's leave the rest of that story out)
15) You have an assignment to submit in 2 days. You haven't started. You decide to start.
16) You feel creative. Very creative. You are. I said creative not intelligent. You still can't do finance.
17) Vodka is a good gambler. You make a ton of money at the Casino....then lose it. All of it.
18) You manage to make it to the bus to get back. It is freezing. You feel much more sane.
19) You listen to the iPod. The song you are listening to is "Gay Fish". You sing it out loud. You think you have a great voice. You don't. Luckily you are sitting alone.
20) You get up the next day morning with the mother of all headaches. What the fuck did you expect!!
and....that's the way it goes......
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